If people were deceiving you right to your face would you want to know? That’s not such an unheard of idea. When people talk with each other today it’s common not to say what we mean.
Honey, do these jeans make me look fat?
No.
[It’s your butt that makes your jeans look fat but I can’t say that.]
Would you like to go out again?
Yes.
[He never heard from her again.]
He’s a really great worker.
[I’m glad he’s out of my department. He wasn’t a good employee.]
It’s easier to say what we think someone wants to hear instead of saying what we think. We want to avoid hurting another person or the confrontation that might ensue. We want to get our way so we gloss over the truth. Taking the painless way out is just easier. In our communication theses practices are common and it’s considered acceptable. It’s delivering a message by using words that hide our true thoughts.
